Monday, November 29, 2010

Truth in Lending

When you get a loan from the bank you always get a Truth in Lending statement that shows what you will really be paying when your loan is paid in full. For example, my loan for my house might be for $100,000, but when I pay the loan off I will have paid $250,000. It also talks about all the penalties and fees involved in your loan.Today was a Truth in Lending day in my weight loss journey!

It started last night- I started to question if I could really do this (healthy eating, exercise, lose/maintain weight loss) for the REST of my life. The rest of my life should be a looooong time. It's hard work to live a healthy lifestyle and it doesn't seem to be getting any easier. I enjoy working out and I even enjoy how good I feel after eating a healthy meal. Thanksgiving was gross- I hated feeling so full. This is still hard and it is constantly at the forefront of all I do. My muscles hurt all the time (not a bad hurt, more of a "yep, I'm still here" kind of feeling) and I am always thinking about how my food choices will fit into my overall caloric needs. This all seems overwhelming and the price seems so high! I remember when I was signing my mortgage paperwork- overwhelmed and terrified!

These feelings continued during the night and were waiting for me when I woke up this morning. I feel blah today. My excess skin seems extra saggy. I haven't lost for 2 weeks and I'm getting frustrated. My hair was droopy today. I feel fat today. I didn't have any oomph at the gym and I really wanted pizza for dinner.

We did order pizza and guess what? I felt better after the pizza. There is this thing called intuitive eating that encourages people to "listen" to their body and eat what their body is craving. The thought of intuitive eating scares me to death! I live by my food diary and heart rate monitor. I can't imagine eating what my body tells me to eat. Tonight I ate one piece of pizza (yes, really only one!) with a side salad and I felt a lot better. I am going to take tomorrow off from the gym and give my body a break. So, here's my Truth in Lending for the day- It is hard. There are days when I get discouraged. Sometimes a piece of pizza will make you feel better. There may be weeks when the scale doesn't move. NEVERTHELESS, in the end you will get a healthy body that allows you to play with your kids, shop in regular clothing stores, sail up the stairs at work, and feel better about yourself than you have in years (most of the time!).

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Weight-loss and My Faith

I was reading today that someone was going to start doing a Bible Study called "Scale Down~ Live it Up!" and decided to check it out. The book focuses on making small changes and seeing big results (agreed! Small changes do really add up!!!). It also looks at how nurturing your relationship with God will also improve how you care for your body. This book got me thinking about my own faith and how it has helped me through the process of weight loss. I've never written about my faith in relation to my weight loss, but am going to take a stab at it tonight.

James 4:17 says "If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them." I was reading this verse one night for devotions and begin to ponder... If I know that I should work out but I don't, is it sin? If I know that I should eat healthy but I don't, is it sin? After much thought I realized that the answer to both of these questions was yes! This verse started me on my journey of weight loss.

Another verse that I have claimed throughout my journey is 1 Corinthians 10:13 "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.".   I FREQUENTLY have to claim this verse as I am walking pass the doughnuts on the counters or getting up from the table even though there is still a piece of pizza left over. God has called me to be healthy and through Him I have the power to make those healthy choices. People often tell me that I have great will power. It's not will power. I have a great God helps me through all circumstances.

Last one... 1 Corinthians 6:19 "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own". I have the Holy Spirit living inside of me and that inspires me to take care of the body He has given me.

I'm far from perfect, but I serve a perfect God that gives me the energy that I need on days that I don't want to work out and gives me the power that I need to make good food choices. I have many other reasons for losing weight (my kids, the loss of my dad, being a better wife, feeling better about myself....), but have learned to lean on God in those times that the other motivating facts aren't keeping me on track.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

The Great Scale Break-Up- Part 2

Last week I broke up with my scale and committed to not weighing myself for one week. I know that that may not seem like a big deal to most people, but for me it meant that I did not weight myself 21 times over the past week! Since I started the business of losing a lot of weight I have relied on the scale to tell me (multiple times a day!) if what I am doing is working. I still tracked on SparkPeople this week and rocked my exercise routine. The results??????
I lost a stinking half a pound! If you have followed my journey you'll know that I usually lose at least 2 lbs a week, but I do have my moments where I don't lose any weight. Here is what I know:

* I am on track to meet my calorie burn goals for the week. I actually should exceed my goals since I have ramped up my running this week.
* I have meet my nutrition goals for 5/7 days. Nope- won't meet it today (Thanksgiving!) :)
* My water hasn't been as good as I'd like since we've been out of school and I haven't had my water bottle on my desk.
* I tried a new class (BOXING!) and the gym yesterday and I am SORE!!!

The last two insights could have contributed to my minimal weight loss via fluid retention. Not a bad week all things considered. I've reminded myself several times today that my goal until New Year's is to simply not gain weight. I'm going to have hubby measure me on Sunday.

What have I learned not using the scale this week? I was relying way too much on the scale to validate my health and my success. The scale is a great tool to monitor weight loss, but it needs to be used as just a tool rather than the ultimate authority on your personal fitness success. I am going to go back to weighing myself, but only once a day instead of the 3 times that I was doing.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Week-long Half Marathon

Run #1
I decided earlier this week that I would run a half marathon, but that I would give myself a week to complete each of those miles. My original plan was to run 1.87 miles a day for 7 days. I was talking with a fellow runner and telling her how I normally run approximately 9 miles a week. She suggested that I just add an extra mile to each of my usual runs and then squeeze in another mile some other time during the week instead of running each day. I wasn't sure that I could even complete 4 miles, but figured I'd give it a shot. Today was the first run and I am delighted to report that I ran 4.27 miles in 56 minutes and burned 787 calories. I even cranked up the speed on the treadmill for the last few minutes because I am such a rock star!

8.83 miles to go... My next run will be on Tuesday and I'll add to this post after that run.

Run #2
School was cancelled today due to snow and ice, but the gym was open! Today I ran for 4.30 miles in 55 minutes and burned 768 calories. I find that around the second mile I always need to stop to go to the bathroom. Probably an odd thing to share, but I am hoping someone has some great insight into this new running issue. I was worried that my first run was just  fluke or that I was on a treadmill that didn't really know how to track mileage. I picked a different treadmill today and was able to complete my miles a whole minute faster. Looking forward to my final run on Friday after a yummy Thanksgiving dinner.

4.53 miles to go... I might squeeze in a half mile tomorrow so that I don't have to do extra on Friday.

Run #3
Final run today! It was tough to get to the gym. My mom made an amazing dinner for Thanksgiving and I ate way to much yesterday. My mom would tell you that I didn't eat enough, but I am here to tell you that I had plenty! :)  I even ate an AWESOME piece of apple pie. Everything in moderation...

Today I ran 4.55 miles in 60 minutes and burned 828 calories! The highlight of my run was that I was able to run for a full mile at 5.0. Ladies and gentleman- that is  a 12 minute mile!!! I didn't think I was capable of doing a 12 minute mile, but today I totally did.

I set out to run a half marathon (13.1 miles) over the course of a week. In the past 6 days I ran a total of 13.12 miles. Woo Hoo!

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Death by Step Class

For a few weeks now I have been attending a FANTASTIC step class with an instructor (props to Linda!)  who is great at calling out the steps and breaking down moves into steps that I can *usually* understand. Today was not pretty! I set up my step in the rear left corner of the room for several reasons...
* I don't want to mess up other steppers by doing the wrong steps in front of them.
* I don't want other steppers watching me mess up.
* I hate running into other people when I am stepping the wrong direction.

Do you sense a theme? Yep, I mess up quite a bit in step and it's OK. :) Today it seemed liked all of the moves were facing the rear left corner. I had a tough time learning the steps when I was facing an empty wall with no one in front of or next to me to follow. All of the reasons that I stay in the rear left corner flew out the window. All eyes were on me doing the wrong steps and facing the wrong direction. Once I got it in my head that I wasn't able to do these steps all hope was lost. Ugh!

What did I do???? Here were the choices that ran through my head:
* Leave out of frustration
* Do a basic step-up for the rest of class
* Bang my head against the wall until I passed out
* Move to another section of the room

I went with the last option and moved to the right side of the room near the front which, for today, was the rear of the room. Confused? Imagine how I felt! ;) I stayed there until I had figured out the steps (for the most part) and then returned to my step for the end of class. I survived step class, burned 568 calories in 55 minutes, and proved to myself once again and I am stronger as an individual than I ever thought I could be- both personally and physically.

Friday, November 19, 2010

Breaking Up

I have to break up with my scale. Over the course of my journey my scale has become my best friend and my worst enemy at the same time. My name is Kari and I weigh myself 2 or 3 times a day. How I feel about myself and my fitness level has become dependent on my weight that morning. In my head I know that weight fluctuates and that it is the long term progress that counts, but in my heart it appears that I have not grasped this concept.

When I eat pizza my weight always goes up a pound or two (stupid fluid retention!) for a few days and then returns to normal. I had a piece of pizza last night. Today I weighed myself (as I do EVERY morning) and was devastated to see that the scale had crept up .2 lbs from yesterday. I was devastated! I shouldn't have been. The weight gain (if you even call .2 a gain?) was expected and yet it caused me to doubt all of my efforts and get frustrated with my progress.

So, I am breaking up with my scale. I have committed to not weighing myself for a week. This is a big deal for me and one that I have second guessed all morning. The scale is ONE indicator of my health, but there are many other indicators that show me I am making great progress. Today I ran at a 5.0 for half of my 30 minute run and 4.0 for the other half. When I first started I was running a 3.5 for 30 seconds. Whoot! Whoot! Also, I tried the stair climber today for the first time and lasted 10 minutes and 31 floors. THAT is proof that I am healthy and in a good place today. See you next week scale. :)

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

My new crazy plan

I was talking to a good friend of mine and she made a prediction that within the next two years I would run a marathon. I laughed for a bit and then told her that I would run a marathon today if they would give me a week to finish. That got me thinking....

Starting on this Sunday, November 21st, I am going to begin a half marathon that will last 7 days. I will run 1.87 miles a day for 7 days and complete a half marathon. :) If I am successful at this attempt than over Christmas break I will attempt to complete my first marathon in a week. I am thinking Thanksgiving week will be a good week to attempt this run since it's a short work week and I need to work off the extra stuffing. (Yum!!!!)

Anyone with me? Who else wants to run a half marathon? You get a whole week to finish! I'm going to start a separate blog of Sunday where I'll document my miles each day and how long it takes for each run.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

You're still beautiful, a size 14 skirt, and goal setting

Back from vacation and I am happy to report that I was able to maintain my weight even though I had fast food twice this week and spent a total of 13 hours in the car over the course of 4 days. I ran 3 out of the 4 days I was on vacation and did a decent job of watching my food without the help of Spark People or my food scale. I went to visit my grandparents and spent 3 days hearing how great I look- a girl really can't get enough of that. :)

Since my picture montage I've had several people make a comment similar to this: You were always beautiful. This got me thinking. When I started losing weight I had one goal in mind and that was to get healthy. Over the course of losing weight I have discovered a variety of new body parts- collar bones, hip bones, and rocking calves. I also look younger and have a better complexion. I never posted my pictures for people to see how beautiful I have become. See, I always thought that I was beautiful. My beauty comes from Christ. I am beautiful because of who I am in Him. I posted my pictures because there is really no other way to document my progress in a way that others could truly understand. Hopefully I am not coming across as boastful or prideful. I truly am amazed at who I've become and want to celebrate with those who have been such a support to me.

On another note, I went to Macy's today for some new clothes. My 18's that I bought in August are dragging on the ground and I have become desperate for new pants. I made some great scores! I bought two skirts and a pair of pants for $23. The pants and one skirt are a comfy size 16 on super clearance and the other skirt is a size 14 (!!!!!!!) also on super clearance. The 14 is cotton and therefor stretchy, but as I explained to my husband, it is STILL a 14. Woot! Woot!

I've set a new goal- my new goal is to not gain weight between now and January 1st. I heard on the radio the other day that the average American gains 8 to 10 pounds between Halloween and New Years. I will still continue my exercise program, but have decided to give myself the slack needed to enjoy and not obsess over the eating season. That doesn't mean I will forget all that I have learned about healthy eating, but it does mean that I can enjoy Thanksgiving stuffing and not feel bad the next morning.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Baggy Jeans and Barbells

Yesterday was quite the day! I felt like I was living in a bad Country Western song- Late for work, students off task, tired beyond tired, forgot my lunch at home, broken down car, wrong pants brought to the gym, rainy day, spilled apple juice, crying over our Kindergarten homework, and a rough time getting the kids to bed.

The was victory in my day!!!! I didn't eat my feelings away. I didn't even cry. I logged my food, drank my water, gave MANY things over to God, and pressed forward. Hubby packed my gym bag for me (note the wrong pants), picked me up from work (note the broken down car) and took the kids and me to the gym. I went to change into my gym shorts and found my 5 year old daughters purple shorts that ARE the same color, but about a 1/10 of the size that I wear. :)

So... the old Kari would have said, "Forget it, I can't work out since I don't have any pants to wear". Not the new Kari! I put on my tank top, threw on my baggy jeans and headed to weight lifting class. I do have to admit that I missed my exercise pants, but had a good workout in my baggy jeans. It even made class a little bit more fun. Each time I looked in the mirror I had to giggle at the fact that I was working out in jeans. It was quite the site to see.

Heading out tomorrow for a little vacation. 6+ hours in the car each way. I've packed some healthy snacks for the trip. I'm packing my running gear and am hoping to come home to see maintenance on the scale after vacation. I'll blog when I get back.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Beyond obesity with picture montage

Last night I stepped on the scale and saw that I was only half a pound away from being out of the "obesity" range according to my BMI chart. Woo hoo!!! I was like a little kid on Christmas eve last night. I woke up every few hours wanting the sun to come up so that I could go weigh myself again. I am 5'10" and the top of my overweight range is 208 pounds. I weighed myself this morning and weighed 207.6 pounds. Now, most women would not be bragging about their weight, but for me this is a weight I have been working towards for 17 months!

How did I celebrate my new status???? I went to the gym and went for a run on the treadmill.  Today has been interesting....

I remember when I got married and we were driving to our honeymoon location. It was a bit of a bummer. I had planned for months and months for this single day and in an instant it was over. My weight loss experience has been similar. I've always thought 208 was this magical number. I am the same today as I was yesterday. The only difference is that now my doctor won't check the obese box when I go in for my next appointment. On the flip side I am nothing like I was 17 months ago.

Today also brought a bit of anxiety. I started to wonder: What if I gain it all back? What if this suddenly becomes too hard? What if I just stop caring? I read blogs ALL THE TIME about people who have lost 50+ pounds only to gain it back. I can't imagine doing that to my body, but I know that it does happen. This is where my friends come in. I am asking you to be brave and remind me of my goals and the importance of taking care of my body if the day does come that I begin to slack. Hubby has very specific directions about how to kick me in the butt if he ever sees me not taking care of my body or making excuses for continual poor eating choices.

Don't get me wrong! Today has been full of celebrations, but also some anxiety and post goal meeting let-down. I always said that I would do a photo montage once I reached my major goal of no longer being obese. Before I post I must give thanks to my friends and family that have been SOOO supportive of my efforts. I have a friend who actually ran a 5K with me to support my efforts. Another friend always calls and reminds me of how proud she is of my progress. Countless friends who started C25K when I was in the thick of it. I loved hearing their progress. Lastly, I have an amazing husband who has supported all of my crazy goals (and fitness purchases!) and great kids who have let me drag them to the gym on countless days so that Mommy can get healthy. XOXOXOXO
I'm not sure what my next big goal will be, but I know that I already have established the routines in my life needed to meet that goal.

Here's the montage:

Monday, November 1, 2010

I have SO not arrived

I have been feeling great about my progress over the past few days. In the next month (hopefully less) I will no longer be considered "obese" using my handy BMI calculator. I have fallen in love with shopping for smaller clothing and my body is now capable of things I never thought possible. Here's the rub....

Last night was Halloween and I had a TOUGH time. We went to a Halloween activity at church and had a blast. When we went inside to play games there were cupcakes everywhere. They were beautifully displayed and smelled amazing. I had a glass of water and tried to ignore the cupcakes, but it was so hard. When we were leaving church I was a little bit cranky that I *couldn't* have a cupcake. I know, I know...I could have had one! Here's the problem- I know that if I have had one cupcake I would have spent the rest of the night eating, eating, eating.

When we got home we ate dinner and go ready to go out Trick or Treating. Hubby was staying home to pass out candy. I opened the bag of candy to put in the bowl for the Trick or Treaters and it smelled amazing. I wanted candy! I was strong and one had one piece, but really wanted more. Then I started to have those thoughts...
Why does everyone else get to eat candy and I don't?
I'm mad that I can't eat whatever I want.
This shouldn't be so hard.

As I am writing down what I was thinking/feeling I have realized what a baby I was being. It's not that everyone else can do it. For MOST of us there are consequences to what we eat. Life isn't fair- I am not going to get everything that I want in life. That's not how it works. Of course this is going to be hard- change is hard! I look forward to the day when my mood is not determined by what I choose to eat or not eat. For now? I'm going to stick to my guns, make healthy choices, and wait for some pie at Thanksgiving. :)

About Me

My photo
On June 19, 2009 I started my weight loss journey. It has become quite the journey! As of today (2-1-11) I have lost 162 pounds and have gained a whole new life. This blog is a continuation of my journey. I hope to inspire and encourage others through my process.