Detox City

Lately there is a resurgence of people around me doing some sort of cleanse or detox. I won't mention names, but you know what I'm talking about. People are having amazing results. 5 pounds in 6 days. 8 pounds in a week. Comments like, "The shake is just as good as breakfast" or "It's only ____ days and then you gradually reintroduce real food". People love it! I want to love it. I want to be able to drink two shakes a day and a sensible dinner. I want to drop 8 pounds in a week. I want to "feel the best I have in 15 years". I want all of that.... 

AND THEN I remember. I remember how I have watched countless friend put it all back on and then some after stopping the program. I remember how much money these programs cost and how they continue to cost if you want to sustain loss. I remember how hard it is to go to a party and not eat because it's not your cheat day.  

I weighed myself this morning- 213.6! UGHHHHHHHH!!!! I am approaching obese again. 

I cried in the bathroom. Immediately my mind went to detox or cleanse. 

The scale is just a number. I get that, but right now it's a number that I am super uncomfortable with. It's my eating. I haven't been tracking. This sucks! There is a rationale part of me that know that if I go back to tracking that within 2 months I can be back down to my maintenance weight- 2 pounds a week. Slow and steady wins the race. The irrational side of Kari is FED UP. I'm tired of tracking my food. I'm tired of always having to focus on what I eat. I exercise faithfully, that should be enough.  

What's a girl to do??????

After I had a fit in the bathroom and said nasty things to the scale and about myself I went in to fix breakfast. Spinach, 2 eggs, whole wheat toast and a cup of coffee. I'm ready to start my day. Today I am going to record. Today I am going to make healthy choices. 

Today

~Kari