I want, at times desperately, to be back to the 193 pounds that I was last summer. 193 bothered me. I wanted more. I wanted to no longer be overweight (172 lbs if you are wondering). I was constantly striving for something that may never be.
Since Fitbloggin much of my time has been spent evaluating my food choices. Choosing cleaner meals and healthier snacks. I'm not perfect. I make "bad" choices and full accept that it is my choice to make. Eating healthier has made me feel healthier and I love that. It has not, however, made the scale take giant leaps downward like I think that it should.
The gym was calling my name extra early today. We have a full day ahead of us and the only time it would fit was 1st thing in the morning. I went in to do Stage 1, Workout A, Session 3 (that's a mouthful!) of New Rules of Lifting for Women. Half way though my workout I caught myself in the mirror. Myself today, not the 356 pound myself that I normally see in the mirror. I'm going pretty good! I'm not where I want to be, but I am doing what I want to do.
What if I never lose another pound?
What if I am as fast as I'll ever be?
What if I am always "overweight" on the BMI chart?
I am developing forever habits.
I am not changing my life for the scale.
I am changing my life for me health, for my family, for me.
So.... even if I never lose another pound, I am still headed in the right direction. My kids are flourishing in the health deptartment. We even did a fun run together this past weekend.
I had to weigh Sissy the other day to see how much medicine to give her. Before I weighed her she asked me if she was suppose to be losing and gaining weight. My answer? "You are suppose to be growing into a healthy young woman". That's what it's about. It's about growing. Always growing.
~Kari
